Before setting down any moral principle, two things must be considered: The first is that steady dating or company-keeping has for its purpose marriage.
This does not mean that two persons who date will necessarily get married.
Are there circumstances when it is not allowed to date or "go steady" with someone?
So with that list, you’re trying to get people to think about chastity differently? Too often we approach questions about chastity from a negative standpoint. That’s serious business – entertaining business, mind you, but not mere entertainment. At least for women, the more serious smooching we do, the more of our hearts we give. The rest of the reason is that such a question reveals we’re not thinking about sexual intimacy properly.
We ask ourselves, “How much can we do before I have to go to confession.” But if that’s the question we’re asking, the battle is already half lost. Partly because the farther we go, the harder it is to stop, both physically and emotionally. And the more we give our hearts, the more we want to give everything else. The ability to give ourselves, body and soul, to another is a tremendous gift. It’s one of the most beautiful and powerful ways in which we image God, who is self-gift.
When I was a kid, my mom taught me two rules of grocery shopping.
First, never shop when youre hungry everything will look good and youll spend too much money. Ive got the first rule down, but I havent had much success with that second rule.
I seem to have a knack for picking rusty grocery carts that make clattering noises or ones with squeaky wheels that grate on your nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard. You want to go in a straight line, but the cart wants to swerve to the left and take out the cat food display.
But by far the worst kind of cart you could pick is the swerver. (And, much to our dismay and embarrassment, it too often succeeds!
Even if the period of dating does not end with a marriage because of the discovery that a marriage between the two is out of the question, still, the purpose of testing, of finding out was still kept.
And so the idea of possible marriage can never be excluded from steady company-keeping, because it is done to find out if marriage is possible.
This Q&A is continued from last week’s discussion with Emily.) Chapter four, “Sex, Chastity & The Biological Clock,” is a big one – it covers so many key issues for single women. People know their own personal strengths and sources of temptation way better than I do.