I can bet with almost certainty that you spend the large majority of your time on your phone while only a minuscule amount of time spent out in the open.
I’ve been emphasising something over the past few months that I feel it’s time to revisit: Dating is a discovery phase.
Use the period from when you meet whether it starts out online or in the ‘real world’ as an opportunity for you both to discover the ‘facts’ about one another and assimilate whether you want to progress…or opt out.
You need more than physical and sexual attraction – you should be getting an initial sense of their values and whether they treat you with care, trust and respect, and of course match words with actions.
If you’re not getting to know them or you are, and are experiencing things that are at the very least proceed with caution signals or at their worst, full on abort mission signals, this is because you’ve already decided to commit, regardless.
How does the app find so many people for us to reject?
But loads of tech experts on the internet have analysed how the app works to figure out the mechanisms behind it, sharing the most likely algorithms behind our matches and explaining why Tinder functions the way it does. After you swipe through the super-fit people, you’ll then be shown loads of profiles who’ve already swiped right on you, and are eagerly awaiting your swipes.
On her screen, images of men appeared and then disappeared to the left and right, depending on the direction in which she wiped.
I felt a deep sense a rejection -- not personally, but on behalf of everyone at the bar.
Generally speaking, to get to the point of going on a date, there is some level of attraction there.