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If all of these conditions apply to you, you are permitted to ENTER.I’m both enormously sick and hard at work trying to pull myself out of the huge pile of work I’m buried in, so here are some thoughts I’ve picked up on dating and smashing Filipino girls for the past month. Yes, in a good number of cases, all you need to do is show up and not be a weirdo to get the pussy.

News flash: More and more women are jumping outside their marriages in search of no-strings-attached sex. An Internet connection and an account on a site like Ashley

We sent writer and monogamist Teddy Wayne to meet the growing flock of lady Don Drapers *And not by their husbands My eyes are blurry from too many post-midnight hours in front of my laptop, trolling through scores of Internet-dating profiles of women.

She screamed and tried to get up, but the second dude grabbed her hands, bent her over the table and forced her to suck, while the first one was savagely bonking her pussy.

Linda was sorting out the closet and accidentally broke a cup.

It goes like this: you’ll start texting her, she’ll agree to meet you at place X, but then an hour before you meet, she’ll suddenly text you asking to meet at place Y instead because it’s “closer.” This is despite the fact that she had no problem meeting you at place X the night before.

I’ve had no less than girls in the past month try and pull this on me and I’ve nexted every single one.

She tried to clean out the pieces before the landlord could see it, but he heard the clattering and went to see what she had done this time.

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But Filipinas are far from stupid; they’re cunning and have their own share of stupid head games they play.

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